Cutting to the chase. Here’s my top 5!
Number 1: My mom doesn’t finish her sentences 70% of the time. That’s a real long dinner table conversation at my house. My mom has ADD, so she gets distracted a lot. This leads to her discontinuing sentences. It’s kind of hard to understand her when she’s talking about something important, and …
Number 2: Sometimes my mom is very hard to explain things to. When my mom is doing something, she has to concentrate completely. She has ADD so it’s hard for her to listen to me and do something at once – my solution? When I’m asking something of her, stop what she’s doing for a second and listen! Usually, she’s just checking Facebook. I mean, if she’s sending an important email, then I understand.
Number 3: My mom laughs at me without feeling bad. Ever heard the excuse, “I’m not laughing at you, I’m laughing at your situation!” Well, when I hear that from my mom, my reaction is to tell her that she’s still technically laughing at me, the situation I’m in. Laughing is a sign of pleasure. In some twisted way, she must take pleasure from things going wrong for me.
Number 4: My mom uses “thing” to describe every item in the house. Well, you saw the title, my mom literally says things like, “Margaret, go put your thing on the thing.” It’s a struggle to even try to understand what she’s saying because then I get really annoyed because her sentences begin to trail off, and I begin to acquire a “tone.” Then the conversation will get into the whole, “back-talk” lecture. Generally, I just stop in my tracks until she notices that I’m not doing what she said to, and I ask her again – that time she usually tells me in a more articulate fashion.
Number 5: My mom is a terrible loser/winner. My family loves game night. We all play games together. Whenever my mom wins, she gloats and dances and sings – the whole enchilada. Oh, but when she loses, she instantly hates the game. Get what I’m saying?
Next stop: 5 things my mom does that I love.